Sometimes I wonder. What is it really that I want? I'm beginning to think that my 'greed' originates from the possible fact that I don't really know what it is I want and thus, want everything just to be sure. Or perhaps it's the insecurity that I don't want to end up with nothing. I don't really know. Human emotions and intentions can be such a puzzling thing. It can take so much effort for someone to understand himself.

To be a stranger to oneself. Such a dilemma can be a real drag. To have been doing things because people tell you to, then when no one tell you anything, you haven't clue on what you want to do. Being with limited time on this plane of existence, I panic and try to puzzle life together into something that isn't so bad. Sometimes forcing pieces into places they do not belong. Thus, possibly destroying the entire puzzle itself. When I realize this, I begin to fear destroying it and become very cautious of putting it together only to remember that time runs short.

A rather funny scenario, really. I just laugh at the fact I can't find my direction because of such a funny dilemma. Will I forever simply laugh at my predicament?

And so shall I.

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